How to Talk to Users and Validate Your Idea Before You Start Building Your Product

Most founders start with the wrong sequence. They build first, then look for users. They spend months creating features, polishing interfaces, and perfecting their vision, only to realize they built something the market didn’t need.

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The smartest founders do the opposite. They talk to potential users before writing a single line of code. They validate their assumptions with real conversations, not guesswork. They learn what people actually need instead of building what they think people want.

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This approach feels risky because you’re exposing your raw idea to criticism. But building without validation is far riskier. You could spend months building something that solves a problem nobody has or addresses a pain that isn’t actually painful.

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I see this mistake constantly. Founders spend three months building their MVP, launch it with excitement, and then… nothing happens. Nobody signs up. Nobody cares. The few people who try it never come back.

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The founders who succeed do something that feels counterintuitive. They talk to potential users before they write any code. They ask uncomfortable questions. They listen to answers they don’t want to hear. And because of this, they build things people actually want.

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Why we avoid these conversations

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Let me guess your objections, because I’ve heard them all before.

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You’re worried someone will steal your idea. Listen, your idea isn’t as unique as you think it is. There are probably three startups working on something similar right now. What matters isn’t the idea itself but how well you execute it. Plus, most people are too busy with their own problems to steal yours.

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You think you already know what users want. This is dangerous thinking. Even if you’re solving your own problem, you’re still just one person. Your specific situation might not apply to enough people to build a business around. I’ve seen founders build elaborate solutions for problems that turned out to affect only them and two other people on the internet.

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Maybe you feel like you need to build something first before people can give meaningful feedback. This is backwards. People can tell you tons about their problems, their current solutions, and what frustrates them most. Often they give better feedback when they’re not distracted by buttons and colors.

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Or you think it takes too long. User validation takes a few weeks. Building the wrong product takes months or years. Do the math.

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Finding people to talk to

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Start with people you already know, but not for the reasons you think. Your friends and family probably aren’t your target users, but they can help you practice. Use them to get comfortable asking questions and refine your approach. Think of them as your training wheels.

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Then get creative about finding your real audience. LinkedIn is your best bet here because it’s naturally filtered by profession and industry. You can find people with exact job titles that match your target users and send thoughtful, personalized messages. The key is not to pitch but to ask for their expertise. Mention that you’re researching challenges in their industry and would value their insights. People love sharing their professional knowledge, and LinkedIn makes it easy to find the right people.

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You can also join Facebook groups where your potential users hang out, but be helpful first. Answer questions, share insights, be genuinely useful. After you’ve established yourself as someone worth listening to, then you can ask if anyone would be willing to chat about challenges they face.

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Reddit can work if you’re careful about it. Find relevant subreddits and look for people discussing problems you might solve. Reach out individually rather than posting broadly.

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Sometimes the best approach is finding businesses that serve your target market but don’t compete with you. A marketing agency might know small business owners who struggle with the exact problem you want to solve.

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Setting up conversations that work

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Once you’ve identified people to talk to, make it ridiculously easy for them to say yes. Send a brief, personalized message explaining that you’re researching challenges in their industry and would value their expertise. Offer specific time slots or include a Calendly link so they can pick what works for them.

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When you get on the call, keep your video on and start with some small talk. Break the ice and make them comfortable before diving into questions. Always ask for consent before recording, and let them know the conversation will help you build something better.

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Have your questions prepared beforehand, but don’t make it feel like an interrogation. Think of it as a structured conversation where you’re genuinely curious about their world.

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Here’s where most people mess up: they ask the wrong questions and get useless answers. The quality of your questions directly determines how well you’ll understand your users and how effectively you can build and share your product later.

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Don’t ask “Would you use a product that does X?” People say yes to hypothetical products all the time. They have no skin in the game, so why not be optimistic?

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Instead, ask about their current reality. “What’s the most frustrating part of how you handle this today?” Let them tell you their story. “Can you walk me through what happened the last time this problem came up?”

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Listen for emotion in their language. When someone says “It drives me absolutely crazy” or “I hate dealing with this,” you’ve found something worth exploring. Mild frustration like “It’s a bit inconvenient” usually isn’t enough to build a business around. The more specific and emotional their responses, the better you’ll understand their pain points and the more precisely you can position your solution when you launch.

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Ask about money and time. “How much time does this cost you each week?” and “What would it be worth to you to solve this completely?” These aren’t just validation questions. They’re pricing research and messaging gold for your future marketing.

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Dig into their current solutions. “How do you handle this now?” and “What have you tried that didn’t work?” This tells you what you’re competing against and why existing solutions fall short. More importantly, understanding their current language and frustrations gives you the exact words to use when describing your product to similar users.

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Here’s something most people miss: make them feel important. Ask for their expertise, acknowledge their experience, and show genuine interest in their insights. People open up more when they feel valued, and that’s when the best insights come out.

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Always leave 5–10 minutes at the end for open conversation. Ask “Is there anything about this topic that I haven’t asked you about?” Some of the most valuable insights come from these unstructured moments when people share what’s really on their minds.

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What you’re really listening for

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One person complaining might just be having a bad day. Three people mentioning the same problem starts to look like a pattern. Five people and you’re onto something real.

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Pay attention to how they describe the problem. If they struggle to articulate it or keep changing the subject, it might not be a high priority for them. But if they light up and start telling detailed stories about all the ways this problem affects their life, you’ve hit something important.

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Watch for interruptions. When someone cuts you off mid-question to share their own experience, that’s gold. It means you’ve touched on something they think about often.

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The best validation signal isn’t enthusiasm for your solution. It’s evidence that they’re already spending time, money, or both trying to solve this problem. Complex workarounds, expensive tools, manual processes that take hours — these all indicate real pain worth addressing.

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Red flags that should worry you

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If everyone loves your idea but no one will pay for it, you probably haven’t found a painful enough problem. People are naturally polite. They’ll encourage your dreams while having no intention of becoming customers.

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When multiple people redirect you to completely different problems, pay attention. You might not be solving the most important thing.

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If you’re having trouble finding people who deal with this problem regularly, your market might be too small. I’ve seen founders spend weeks trying to find anyone who cares about their brilliant solution.

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Green lights that mean keep going

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The best conversations are the ones where people start asking when your solution will be ready. Even better is when they offer to pay or commit time to help you build it. Money and time are how people vote for what they actually want.

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When someone introduces you to their colleague who has the same problem, that’s huge. It means they see enough value to risk their professional reputation by making the introduction.

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Look for people who are already hacking together solutions that clearly don’t work well. If someone is using three different tools and a spreadsheet to accomplish something that should be simple, they’ll pay for a better way.

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The mistakes that kill validation

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The biggest mistake is talking to the wrong people. Your mom’s opinion doesn’t count unless she’s your target customer. Make sure you’re talking to people who actually face this problem in their daily life.

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Don’t fall in love with one enthusiastic user. I’ve seen founders get one great conversation and assume they’ve validated their entire market. You need consistent patterns across multiple people.

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Stop ignoring negative feedback. Critical comments are often more valuable than positive ones. They show you what could go wrong and help you avoid expensive mistakes.

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Don’t validate features before you validate problems. Ask if they have the problem, not if they like your solution.

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What real validation looks like

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Successful validation doesn’t mean everyone loves your idea. It means you have consistent evidence that the problem exists, people are actively looking for solutions, and they’re willing to pay for something better than what they have now.

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You should be able to describe your target user’s problem in their own words. If you can’t explain their pain point using language they actually use, you haven’t listened carefully enough.

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Good validation also means you understand how to reach these people and convince them to try your solution. It doesn’t matter how great your product is if you can’t find customers or explain why they should care.

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What happens next

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Once you have solid validation, resist the urge to build everything at once. Start with the smallest possible version that addresses the core problem you validated. Stay in touch with the people you interviewed — they’re your best feedback source and most likely first customers.

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Keep validating as you build. User needs change, and you’ll discover new aspects of the problem as you create solutions. This isn’t a one-time activity but an ongoing conversation with your market.

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The goal isn’t to eliminate all risk. That’s impossible. The goal is to reduce the biggest risks before you invest months of your life building something nobody wants.

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You don’t need perfect questions or a complete research plan to start. You just need curiosity about people’s problems and willingness to listen to answers that might change your assumptions about what you should build.

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Pick one person you could talk to this week. Send them a message asking about their challenges. Listen to what they tell you. That’s how you build something people actually want instead of something you hope they’ll want.

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The conversation you’re avoiding might save you from building the wrong thing. Isn’t that worth a few potentially awkward conversations?

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